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Your guide to being the perfect wedding guest

We have time and again seen advice on wedding etiquette for the bride and groom, as well as the rest of the wedding party. However have we ever taken time to think of what the couple expect from the guests who attend their wedding? Do they or don’t they have to follow certain etiquette rules as well?

The answer is Yes! Just like the married couple, the guests too have to conform to some basic rules, to ensure the wedding progresses smoothly and without hassles. We will cover these over the course of this article.

#Rule 1

Confirm your participation ASAP

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Your role begins with receiving the wedding invitation. Quickly confirm whether you will be attending or not. This makes the rest of the wedding planning much easier for the couple. Do it in the format that is suggested on the card. Whether they ask you to reply by message, mail or phone, stick to it so there is no confusion later. A card with an RSVP regrets only message is the only exception, where you have to respond only if you wish to decline the invitation. Read more on it at the Wiki link to RSVP invitations.

Here’s the tricky part. What if you aren’t sure you will be attending? You should still inform the couple of your situation and give them a specific date by which you can confirm.

#Rule 2

Get the gift right

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It is customary to give a gift to the couple, and the best gifts are those listed on the couple’s registry. It is unlikely that this information will be provided in the invitation. So, check with the honor attendants or the couple’s parents to find out where they are registered, or look at their wedding website if any. They should ideally provide you with a reasonable number of options. So, make your pick as early as is possible, and either take it with you to the couple’s home prior to the wedding or have it sent directly from the store.

#Rule 3

Dress appropriately and be on time

via Best for Bride

Make sure you find out what type of wedding is planned and dress accordingly. It would be inappropriate to attend a formal event in casual clothes or the reverse. Pay specific attention to details on whether it is black-tie or formal, so you stick to the dress code. Don’t choose a dress that clashes or overshadows that of the bride and groom. Arrive at the venue well ahead of time. It is suggested that you be there at least 30 minutes early. If you are forced to be late for some reason, join the group at the back and don’t cause any confusion.

#Rule 4

Be kind and gracious with your comments

Every couple wants to hear that they’ve had a beautiful wedding. Even if you think otherwise, keep your thoughts to yourself. Congratulate the couple personally when you get the chance. Don’t make any snide remarks, and don’t embarrass the couple or the rest of the wedding party in any way. Try to wait till the bride and groom leave before you depart. Should it be impossible, inform a member of the wedding party that you have to depart and don’t forget to mention that you’ve enjoyed being part of the wedding.

Find the right dress to wear for any type of wedding this year at our link for evening gowns and special dresses on Best for Bride.

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Wedding Registry Tips

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As the newlyweds removed the bow and unwrapped their 7th large, crystal deli tray, they realized they should have created a bridal registry. In my small town, it was not common for a couple to register. I have never been to a wedding where the couple has registered. However, this is becoming more common in communities where it was not always popular. Couples who are not familiar with the practices and etiquette of bridal registry may find these wedding registry tips helpful.

How do you tell people where you are registered? This is where many couples break wedding registry etiquette. The temptation is to put the registry location on the wedding invitations since everyone receives one. However, including the registry information on any written cards such as the invitations or Save the Date cards is considered tacky. Instead, include the wedding information on your wedding website or Facebook page and include the link on the invitation. Also, it’s perfectly fine to mention where you are registered if someone asks about gifts.

Register at both an online retailer and brick and mortar store. You may choose to register at three stores. One of the stores that you register at should be a local store for the convenience of the guests who may not shop online. Some guests may need the ease of an online store due to transportation issues or busy schedules that would make it difficult for them to shop at the store you chose. If you register at three stores, the third can be either a brick and mortar store or online retailer.

Make decisions about the items on the online wedding registry list together. One spouse should not have the responsibility of choosing all the items. Both partners need to be happy with the items on the list. After all, these are the items that you will be living with for years to come. Select items that you will both enjoy.

When you register, select items of varied price ranges at each location. Guests should feel comfortable selecting a wedding gift that is within their budgets. Instead of selecting all high ticket items, consider splitting the registry into thirds. Choose about a third of lower cost items, a third that are middle range, and a third that are higher. How expensive should the items on the registry be? This depends greatly on location and the financial means of the guests. If I quoted a price of $100 as a high range item, this would be beyond the reach of most guests at some weddings and considered too low at other weddings. The couple needs to consider the financial standing of their friends and family and choose registry items accordingly.

Setting up the registry should not be put off until the last moment. Allow your guests to have plenty of time to shop. Some couples set up the registry when they start making their engagement announcements in case anyone would ask for the registry location. Visit Best for Bride blog to learn how to make your wedding an enjoyable experience for everyone.

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The Groom’s Guide—How involved should you be in wedding planning?

1Congratulations on your engagement! Now that the inevitable’s happened, and your lady love has agreed to share her life with you, what do you do next?

Don’t be surprised if your level-headed and practical fiance has already taken on her new part-time job—wedding planning, and while you are wondering about what colors and flowers she talks about all the time, don’t forget that you too have to be involved in planning your marriage. Well, atleast to a certain extent! If you thought the safest thing to do is to nod “Yes honey”, we have some news for you! Better listen to what’s going on, or you’ll regret it later.

While your bride goes ahead with planning “most” of the wedding, here is information on where you should step in and lend a hand!

Money matters

When a woman becomes a bride, cutting down costs suddenly becomes an alien concept. This is where you enter the show. Be there when she plans the guest list and the venue. This will account for a huge part of the wedding budget, so make sure you help with sorting out who has to be there and who doesn’t.

Similarly, set a maximum amount for booking the venue and decorating it. Women are often taken in by the look of a place, and once they are bowled over, there is no taking it back. So, take the initiative to search out alternate venue locations before going to see her suggestion. Ease her into the idea that she can get what she wants for a lesser price. Make it your responsibility, and not only will your bride remember how considerate you were to help her, you will also save some money.

Often ask about the wedding, and offer to help

There is usually a point in the engagement when the bride bursts out into tears and complains that the groom doesn’t care about the wedding. Well, you do, but not with the obsession that she has! But, for her sake and yours, ask about the plans and progress every now and then. Lend a ear when she pours out her frustrations over which shade of peach goes with the green in the décor. You may not have the slightest idea of what she is talking about, but peace with reign!

Your few responsibilities include finding a good tux, picking your groomsmen and getting in shape for the wedding. So, do these with gusto, and she will be proud of you.

Be involved in things that matter to you

You do not have to touch the invitations, flowers or wedding shopping. Let her handle it. Where the cake is concerned, make suggestions only if you are asked. Nevertheless, go along and enjoy all the tasting sessions she plans.

Instead, concentrate on the wedding music. Be involved in deciding which songs ought to be played, and definitely those that shouldn’t be.

One mistake grooms make is to avoid the wedding registry. It’s your folly. If you want other gifts besides than silver tea cups and pretty home ornaments, you will have to register at places of your choice too. So, make sure you do!

For more wedding related tips and advice both for the bride and the groom, check out our website at Best for Bride.

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When You’d Rather Have Cash

Some engaged couples move in together long before they are married and have everything they need, not having to rely on bridal shower and wedding gifts to furnish their homes with a brand new toaster or the newest in entertainment. But many couples, however, struggle with the topic of how to ask for cash from their guests instead of gifts – here are some tips.

First off, it is perfectly acceptable for engaged couples to accept cash gifts if they are not the ones asking for it. Traditional wedding etiquette admonishes asking for cash, but if a wedding guest asks the engaged couple what they’d like, the best way is to tell them that you are thinking of saving for something special, such as an upcoming honeymoon.

Don’t just forgo the wedding registry – there’s always an option to include what you’d like as a gift without going to a department store and scanning towels and linens for people who want to buy you something or give you more than “just cash”. Some people believe that giving a physical gift is tradition at a wedding, so expect that you may get a new shower curtain or something decorative, but there are also sites that allow you to ask for items such as gift cards or cash towards a big purchase or a honeymoon.

One such site is called Tendr where guests can pick cards to send with their well wishes and cash, and they can even use all major credit cards. It doesn’t cost you anything to receive funds and it only costs them 2.7% and $1 for every transaction; likely cheaper than buying a card at a store. The site also tracks all of your gifts received so that you can thank the people who sent them.

Have your gift registry all sorted out? Stop by Best for Bride to start shopping for your wedding and bridesmaid dresses, accessories and more!