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The Groom’s Guide—How involved should you be in wedding planning?

1Congratulations on your engagement! Now that the inevitable’s happened, and your lady love has agreed to share her life with you, what do you do next?

Don’t be surprised if your level-headed and practical fiance has already taken on her new part-time job—wedding planning, and while you are wondering about what colors and flowers she talks about all the time, don’t forget that you too have to be involved in planning your marriage. Well, atleast to a certain extent! If you thought the safest thing to do is to nod “Yes honey”, we have some news for you! Better listen to what’s going on, or you’ll regret it later.

While your bride goes ahead with planning “most” of the wedding, here is information on where you should step in and lend a hand!

Money matters

When a woman becomes a bride, cutting down costs suddenly becomes an alien concept. This is where you enter the show. Be there when she plans the guest list and the venue. This will account for a huge part of the wedding budget, so make sure you help with sorting out who has to be there and who doesn’t.

Similarly, set a maximum amount for booking the venue and decorating it. Women are often taken in by the look of a place, and once they are bowled over, there is no taking it back. So, take the initiative to search out alternate venue locations before going to see her suggestion. Ease her into the idea that she can get what she wants for a lesser price. Make it your responsibility, and not only will your bride remember how considerate you were to help her, you will also save some money.

Often ask about the wedding, and offer to help

There is usually a point in the engagement when the bride bursts out into tears and complains that the groom doesn’t care about the wedding. Well, you do, but not with the obsession that she has! But, for her sake and yours, ask about the plans and progress every now and then. Lend a ear when she pours out her frustrations over which shade of peach goes with the green in the décor. You may not have the slightest idea of what she is talking about, but peace with reign!

Your few responsibilities include finding a good tux, picking your groomsmen and getting in shape for the wedding. So, do these with gusto, and she will be proud of you.

Be involved in things that matter to you

You do not have to touch the invitations, flowers or wedding shopping. Let her handle it. Where the cake is concerned, make suggestions only if you are asked. Nevertheless, go along and enjoy all the tasting sessions she plans.

Instead, concentrate on the wedding music. Be involved in deciding which songs ought to be played, and definitely those that shouldn’t be.

One mistake grooms make is to avoid the wedding registry. It’s your folly. If you want other gifts besides than silver tea cups and pretty home ornaments, you will have to register at places of your choice too. So, make sure you do!

For more wedding related tips and advice both for the bride and the groom, check out our website at Best for Bride.

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How to handle it when others try to take over your wedding

via pixabay
via pixabay

Wedding planning is not an easy feat, with thousands of decisions to make and hundreds of arrangements to complete. To add to all this stress is the fact that every wedding party will have at least one person, if not more, who tries to take over the reins and run your wedding for you. If you are a person who cannot say “NO”, you are in for a tough time when these people begin to run the show.

So, what do you do when you feel things are slowly slipping out of your hands? Do you just bite it down and let it be? Or do you put your foot down, and take back control? Let us look at how you can tackle such situations appropriately.

Tactically saying No

From choosing the wedding colors to fixing the guest list and booking vendors, you will have to listen to hundreds of opinions. Do listen to all of them, but do not commit without thinking it through. The best approach is to thank them for their help, and tell them that you will be in touch if you decide this is the option you want.

Remember that at some point of your wedding, you will have to disagree with someone. So, don’t feel guilty about it. Appreciate their well-intended advice or suggestion, but don’t feel you have to go with it if you aren’t comfortable. This is just how weddings work, realize it and it will be easier for you.

Work together and find middle ground

This is important when the people involved are contributing or very dear to you. For example, it may be your parents or in-laws. The fact that they are contributing may lead them to believe that they are entitled to make certain decisions. They may want to invite more of their guests than you would like to have at the wedding, or they may consider choosing the menu.

Although it is your wedding, in such a scenario you should remember that these people have earned the right to their opinion. An amicable solution is the best approach. Discuss several options where the menu is concerned and find one that both of you are satisfied with. Ask them to drop a few guests, while you too do the same. Compromise on matters that don’t have a huge impact, so that everyone is happy in the end.

Delegate tasks that are not crucial

Hand over few responsibilities to your overly eager friends and relatives, so they don’t feel like you are ignoring them entirely. This may be to follow up on a vendor booking, make a list of entertainment options or to check that the deliveries arrive on time. Even so, keep the bigger decisions to yourself. Make it a point to appreciate their help, and thank them profusely for their involvement. This should keep them happy, but out of your way.

Having a perfect wedding is not only about having a hassle-free day. It is also about the happiness you and your wedding party share. So, let this day be fun for all. Though you can’t please everyone, try to tackle difficult situations and bossy relatives sensibly, so no one is offended.

For more wedding advice and tips, as well as to choose your wedding dress visit us at Best for Bride.