I was reading the other day that Hillary Clinton was worried about no-shows. Those people wouldn’t vote for her in the North Carolina primary. Not because they didn’t like her but because they thought she was so far ahead there was no point.
And she was worried that she would lose to Bernie Sanders because more voters for him turned up at the polls. This is something under-reported in elections. That how good candidates are at actually getting people to the polls has a lot to do with how they do an election.
The same thing can happen to you at a wedding. You could find yourself worried that nobody shows up. This is a common human condition. It has nothing to do with any type of mental condition. It’s just normal stress. Because none of us, think we are that important.
I know of famous rock stars. Who have been performing in front of thousands for years, wonder if anybody will show up to see them play. Taylor Swift even says at the beginning of her concert video that one or for goals of her 1989 tour was to see if she could play in front of like 50,000 people.
I doubt you will have that many people at your wedding. But if you can invite that many and have them show up. And more importantly, afford it then hello Mr. Trump.
Seriously let us take a look at how you invite guests to a wedding.
The first task is to define the budget. This is the least fun part of planning a wedding. But it is very important. And I guarantee you that nobody’s wedding budget is ever big enough. But you also don’t want to go broke on your wedding.
I’m going to assume that reading this article, you are not having a super small wedding. For example, I had just immediate family at our wedding. But I was being a Scrooge McDuck. And my wife and I didn’t know about things like pop-up weddings. Because we had the optimal way to host one at her aunt’s house.
But that’s another story.
So once you have a budget, then you can start thinking about your guest list. The reason why you go in this order is because the number of guests has the largest impact on your budget.
At this point, the simplest thing to do is to get out some pencil and paper. And start writing down guests names. Have your husband to be and you both contribute at this point. You may also need to involve your parents.
After you have your list, then start to sort them. Have an A-list. And a B-list. The A-list is the most important ones. These are your closest friends and family. The ones that you will try to accommodate as much as you can. These are the ones who you really want to be at your wedding.
The B list are the people who you would still like to see at your wedding but are not as close. Don’t worry nobody has to actually see any of these lists. Your friend Susie doesn’t have to know that she ranks behind Mary.
It’s also possible you will be arguing with your partner over who makes the cut. I would recommend that each side agrees to the same number of invitees. You get to invite 10. And he just to invite 10. Then the next 10 and so on.
Adjust the numbers to make sense for your budget.
If you must you could further classify people into a third list. Typically these will be people who you know or are related to. But they live far away. You don’t expect them to think they will come to the wedding. But you should send them a wedding notice. This way if they want to send you a card or let’s face it a gift they can.
After all one of the best things about getting married is the gifts and cash.
Once you have created your list of guests then you need to start thinking about invitations.
The wedding invitation has typically two parts.
The first part is called save the date cards. They should go out four to six months in advance. Four months if the wedding is local. Six months if it’s a destination wedding. This way people have plenty of time to pencil the date in on their calendars. And if it’s a destination wedding they have time to start saving up and booking the trip.
Save the date cards don’t have to match your wedding theme.
But by the time you are sending out your wedding invitations you should have a theme. And the invitations should match the wedding theme and colors.
The invitations should go out to four months in advance. Again longer if it’s a destination wedding and shorter if it’s going to be local.
You should also think of setting up a website for your wedding. The purpose of the website is to have a single place for your guests to go to keep up-to-date with the locations and timing of the wedding. You can also link to any place your registered forgets theirs.
Unlike Hillary Clinton or any candidate running for office you don’t have to worry as much about logistics of persuading thousands of people to get out and vote.
Your biggest obstacle in inviting people to your wedding will be your budget. Because the budget will never be enough for what you want to do. That’s just the way we have to dream about our weddings. Yet you will find out that your wedding will still be a magical and blessed event.
Make sure to work with your partner in creating your guest list. If you need to divide up the guests into the must haves and nice to house. Plus make sure to send out your save the date and invitations in a timely manner. I hope this article has provided you with tips on how to invite guests to your wedding.
This is a guest post by Mark Wilcox. He’s the founder of Wedding Intro which helps brides reduce their stress by providing simple and clear wedding planning information.
2 thoughts on “Do you worry that nobody will show up at your wedding?”
I think you have to be realistic to some degree. If you invite 300 people and 200 show up, that is a pretty good number, don’t you think?
No, I am not worried at all. Those that show up with be my closest family and friends. They have been waiting as long as I have been for my wedding day!