Weddings bring out the best and the worst in people. The bride, for one, will be under a lot of stress with planning the umpteen details for her wedding day. So, if you have signed up to be a bridesmaid, this is a time when you can expect to see your friend’s true colors.
Numerous brides have ended up with straining relationships with their bridesmaids as a result of wedding planning. This is unfortunate, as it doesn’t take much to avoid such situations. However, there are also many cases where brides and bridesmaids grew closer than they already were, by the end of a wedding. So, this basically depends on how both parties handle the situation.
As a bridesmaid, this is the right time for you to extend your help and support to the bride. After all, she considers you important and this is why she included you in her bridal party. It would be a kind and welcome gesture if you could extend your assistance to the bride in any way possible. Whether she accepts it or not, your proposal of help suggests you will be by her side, cheering her along.
Here are some of the different ways in which bridesmaids can help brides, as they plan their wedding. If you are soon to be a bridesmaid, read on to see how you can be a valuable asset to your friend, as she plans her wedding day!
1.Take up responsibility
Wedding planning involves so many details. So it is certain you can find an area in which you can contribute. Don’t wait for the bride to delegate duties or request your assistance. Take the initiative to find out what you can do. If you have limited time to spare, choose a task that fits in with your busy schedule. Or if you have talents that can help the bride with her wedding details, offer help in that area.
If you are crafty, you could help with DIY details like wedding favors or décor. Or if you have planned your own wedding, offer to help the bride sort out her wedding planning timeline. Anything from going shopping with her to helping the bride choose her wedding colors, theme or favors to addressing invitations, checking vendor reviews or even scouting for the dress will be of help to the bride. For a comprehensive list of bridesmaids duties, take a look at this article on the Knot website.
2.Try to accommodate the bride’s needs
When you sign up to be a bridesmaid, you should also prepare to accept responsibilities related to the wedding. The bride may want you to go shopping with her, co-ordinate matters with other bridesmaids or simply as a sounding board. Don’t brush off her needs saying you have a tight schedule. Find time to assist and support your friend for this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Make free time in your schedule and take on responsibilities she assigns you. This may sometimes require you to make small sacrifices. Remember that your effort will be worth it, when she will also find a way to return the favor when your turn comes.
3.Make her bridal shower real fun
Since you are responsible for the hen party/ bridal shower, try your level best and make it fun and memorable for your friend. After all the tedious tasks and hectic wedding planning, this is an occasion when your friend can sit back, relax and enjoy herself. It is also a welcome respite for her when she can engage in a party that she doesn’t plan herself.
Although you can easily whip up a party with little effort, do minimum decorations and order food that everyone will enjoy, it isn’t really fair towards the bride. She will certainly appreciate it if you let her have her moment and a little effort from your side can make a huge difference. Round up the rest of the bridesmaids and do some brainstorming. Get creative, involve yourselves in some DIY tasks and plan a party with plenty of personal touches that will mean a lot to the bride. Find all that you need to plan the perfect bridal shower in this article on the Huff Post.
4.Help her with her all-important wedding dress decision
Most brides see the inside of a wedding dress boutique for the first time after they are engaged. So, shopping for their wedding dress can be overwhelming with hundreds of available options. Add to it the fact that wedding dress shopping comes with its own dictionary of terms, don’t be surprised if your friend is confused and nervous about the whole thing.
If you are already equipped with the knowledge of how wedding dress shopping goes, share your ideas with her. You may come across useful information in magazines or online. Collect them and give it to your friend, so she can use it. If she invites you to go wedding dress shopping, try to find out what her preferences are. Encourage her to make the decision that is right. Remember that this is her choice. So keep her best interests in mind when you make suggestions and recommendations. Be on her side if the rest of the entourage are opinionated and tend to confuse her.
5.Be sensitive around the bride
Wedding planning can cause nervousness and exhaustion to such an extent, that even a cool-headed woman can turn into a Bridezilla. Many friendships and relationships have suffered irreparable losses due to wedding planning stress. While it is up to the bride to try and stay sane during all the wedding planning, there is a lot you can do to help her take it in her stride. Understand that your friend has a lot on her plate. So, try to overlook it when she seems unreasonable. Remember that this phase will pass. Listen to her and help her stay optimistic. Check in on her when she is under undue stress and help her when she needs someone.
6.Go with the flow
Although your friend may ask your opinion on every single wedding planning aspect, do not feel offended or disappointed if she doesn’t use your suggestions. Be honest with your opinions, but don’t patronize. As the bride, she will have her own vision and will have thought of her wedding a thousand times in her head. So, it is likely she will pick ideas that blend in with her overall vision. Don’t take it personally if your ideas don’t appeal to her. It could just be that she doesn’t think it fits in with her idea of how the day should be. It isn’t because she doesn’t value your opinion or asks just for the sake of it. Remember that it is her special day. All you can do is offer help that she may or may not take.
7.Be proactive with your responsibilities
There will be a lot of responsibility on your shoulders before, during and after the wedding day. The bride counts on you to make all these things happen on time. Take responsibility and do things punctually and with perfection. If she specifies a deadline for a task, make your plans so this deadline is met. Always double-check with the bride in case of doubt. Your timely help is crucial. So, don’t procastinate and delay things unnecessarily. Be proactive and offer assistance to the rest of the bridal party with their tasks, if you have the time for it. Your involvement and support will lend a positive atmosphere to the wedding planning, and the bride will surely appreciate it.
8.Prepare to handle pre-wedding jitters
Don’t be surprised if the bride is too stressed out at times and suffers from pre-wedding blues. Remind her that this is normal, and only because she is stressed. Don’t dismiss her when she comes to discuss her fears and anxiety. Convince her that all will be well, and that you will support her through it. The bridal party can always plan a surprise girls evening for the bride to unwind and put aside her wedding planning stress for a while. The wedding eve is when a stressed out bride is most susceptible to pre-wedding jitters. Prepare yourself and handle this sensibly and make her last day as an unmarried woman pleasant and memorable.
9.Adjust well with the team
You will not be the only person in the bridal party. With the bride picking friends and family members to support her as bridesmaids, you will have to work alongside women of different personalities. This can sometimes lead to conflicts. If the group is large, striking a rapport with the different members becomes important. Since you should work together to plan the bridal shower and to co-ordinate on the wedding day, compromise and adjustment becomes necessary. Disagreements are normal, but don’t make the mistake of taking it too far and ruining the bride’s peace of mind. Respect each others space and stay away from arguments that can get out of hand.
10.Be prepared for emergencies
Emergencies of various natures can crop up anytime during the wedding. This can quickly throw the entire wedding plans off-balance and create stressful situations for the bride. As her pillar of support, be prepared for such situations, step in and help in whatever way you can. You can also prepare for certain likely issues, well in advance. Consider packing an emergency kit with items like safety pins, chalk, tissues, blotting paper and safety pins and hair pins which may come in handy at any time on the wedding day. Also consider warning your bride about likely trouble situations like weather problems, if you foresee a likely problem. A list of common emergencies and how to tackle them are available here on the Bride Box.
11.Don’t complain or be snarky
We get it if you do not agree with the bridesmaid dress choice or are unhappy with your friend’s wedding planning decisions. Nonetheless, remember that it is her wedding and her decision and you ought to respect it. If something makes you really uncomfortable, like perhaps the chosen dress style, tell the bride about it. However, keep it to the point. Accept it if she prefers to stick with her choice. It is just the matter of one day. Go with it and rest assured, you will not suffer any permanent damage because of it.
12.Don’t embarrass the bride
You don’t want to be that bridesmaid who gives the bride nightmares. Unfortunately, few women realize the trouble they cause their friends by simply voicing out unwarranted opinions and advice, spilling wedding plans and going overboard with drinking at the wedding. Act sensibly and know your limits. You will participate in several celebrations, like the bridal shower, rehearsal dinner, wedding ceremony and reception. Don’t do anything that will make the bride regret her decision of making you bridesmaid. She has enough stress to handle as it is; you do not want to add to it in any way.
Bridesmaids have a very important role in a wedding. However, it is one that comes with various important responsibilities. Appreciate the gesture of your friend, who values your support and invited you to be part of her special day. She deserves your presence, guidance and assistance as she embarks on planning the biggest event in her life. Use this opportunity to be a good friend and make her day extra-special with your personal efforts. As you look back on this experience in the future, it will be one that is filled with special memories and a sense of accomplishment.
For bridesmaids dresses that are perfect for the occasion, don’t forget to take a look at our vast inventory of dresses for the bridal party. Available in every color, dress style and size, there is something for everyone. So, why don’t you browse through it and pitch in when the bride invites suggestions for the dresses for her best friends? Click here to see what we have in store.